You and your friends were talking about the Syracuse Orange the other day when they asked when the #jokesandgarbage previews were coming. When a friend asks for jokes, then you help them. That’s just the decent thing to do....so grab a Puppers and let’s try and be efficient here.
Boston College Eagles- Glen
Sort of church affiliated. Kind of weird but for the most part harmless. Trying to make over their bland persona with a new look
Clemson Tigers- Wayne
Toughest in town even though fashion sense isn’t a strength. They might lose a scrap now and then but they bounce back. Always offering to lend a hand but to be fair (to be fair) they’ll throw a sucker in a donnybrook every now and then.
Duke Blue Devils- Devon
They were around at the beginning but now they could just leave and be replaced by some Degens from up North and the ACC football narrative wouldn’t miss a beat.
Florida State Seminoles- Ginger and Boots
Really tough but no one wants them hanging out with the group because of the rumors about that one incident with the crab legs.
Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets- McMurray
No one knows what they are saying most of the time and when they do that weird lift on the sidelines thing you swear Geoff Collins is talking about goin’ down to Cabo or the Keys.
Louisville Cardinals- Stewart and Roald
Love to be in all black. Unpredictable behavior and no one knows how they end up doing so well with the recruits from the big city.
Miami Hurricanes- Reilly and Jonesy
All about the dirty dangles and snipes and not into doing the little things needed to win. Can they put aside the hate for leg day long enough to win a ‘ship? Word out of Coral Gables says there’s more focus on team-building then worrying about sick cellys boys.
NC State Wolfpack- Daryl
Dairy farmer with a habit of screwing things up when they are going well. Can’t seem to handle success but Dave Doeren can’t believe they aren’t winning ACC titles right now.
Like to throw out some notes from Prof. Tricia’s lectures to make himself seem smarter than the others but often goes overboard withs his appreciations.
Notre Dame Fighting Irish- Tanis
Nothing’s personal here. It’s all about what’s best for business and if some feelings get hurt along the way then that’s just how it goes. Are they friends or foes? Depends on if you are helping them make more money
Pittsburgh Panthers- Shorsey
Win or lose they are going to fight and talk trash and if any HC in the ACC is doing naked handstands and taking monster dumps at halftime it’s Narduzzi. Odds are he’s even told a player or two to “give yer balls a tug”.
Every time it looks like the Orange are climbing back to being a relevant program the building burns down. Maybe MoDeans 44 would have better luck...
Virginia Cavaliers- Rosie
You can find them rescuing dogs or enjoying a good book and well there could be worse things. They don’t get caught up in worrying about what others are doing, they try and stay true to themselves.
Virginia Tech Hokies- Letterkenny Irish
Too much contempt for those who want them to adapt their strategy leads to a drop from the top of the league. We’re pretty sure Brent “Boomtown” Pry loves his wife, leg day and his Beamer Ball.
Wake Forest Demon Deacons- Bonnie McMurray
Do you ever hear anyone say a bad word about either? Right now they seem to be the darling of media experts and fans of other programs hoping to figure out how to overcome recruiting challenges and still produce a winner. Dave Clawson probably makes a mean Caesar.
Now we need you to chime in because that’s what we appreciates abouts you.