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It’s Wednesday, so you know what that means... time for the blog that gives you the internet’s most ridiculous college football preview series- it’s #FakeNunes time. Have we found some creative ways to get #jokesandgarbage into a Syracuse Orange preview? Probably not but if one of you chuckles this is a success in our book.
Now onto this week’s opponent
Opponent: NC State Wolfpack
Location: Raleigh, NC
Students: 36,304 students who can’t wait for hockey season to start
The 2022 Fake Nunes Statistical Index (#FNSI)
We continue to look to innovate our analytics model so we here’s what the lab cooked up for this season.
NEW Rivalry Trophy
The FNSI staff realized that some of what’s missing in these games is that the Orange aren’t playing for any rivalry trophies and they are out to fix that injustice. Each week the winner of the FNSI will get to take home a new trophy. This week we give you
The Hay is Never in the Barn Trophy
NC State was founded as an agricultural school. Syracuse’s first win in this series was behind Jerome Smith’s 140 yards rushing. Playing for a golden hay bale seems appropriate.
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Come on folks..you had to see this one coming right?
The Great One Hair Factor
In order to maintain our status as #CanadasCollegeTeam, each week we look at who is wearing #99 and determine who has the better salad.
Elijah Fuentes-Cundiff takes this one in a walk-over because NC State has three #98’s and didn’t force Caden Noonkester into a 99.
Advantage: Syracuse
Notable Alum
Bringing back this one as we love to drop some knowledge every now and then to help our loyal readers possibly win a trivia night. After all we are the Syracuse blog that loves you back and we take that seriously.
Bill Cowher vs Tom Coughlin
It’s the battle of former football players who made their mark as Super Bowl winning coaches. Someone will have to explain to us how Cowher with one Super Bowl title is in the Hall of Fame while Coughlin who beat Brady and Belichick twice is not.
Advantage: NC State because we admit the gold blazer is tough to top
Football Program Hashtag:
None vs #1Pack1Goal
Slightly unique. Ties in nickname to the notion of team. Just one question- what is the goal now for the Pack?
Advantage: NC State
Linebackers Coach Looks Like:
Fans of the LeBatard Show might know this game, it’s where we guess what is the best description for a position coach from each team. This year’s choice will be linebackers coach. This week’s match-up (now easier to compare thanks to Michael’s discovery of the image slider):
Tony Gibson looks like a guy who thinks $10 is too much to pay for a haircut.
Tony White looks like a guy who doesn’t need a haircut but still spends his Saturday at the barber shop.
Advantage: Syracuse because you always want to be around the guy in the middle of everything at the barber shop.
The Official #FakeNunes Game Prediction
Dave Doeren keeps his quarterbacks warming up in the field outside Lawrinson so the Syracuse coaches don’t know who will take the snap. It ends up being Jack Chambers and like so many players from smaller conferences he’ll have a career day in the Dome. Fans will be restless as halftime finds the Orange down 10 but during the Ring of Honor ceremony, Jim Brown takes a 44 jersey and puts it on Sean Tucker. Tucker runs wild in the 3rd quarter racking up 144 yards in that quarter alone as fans frantically try and share his runs on IG Live.
Don’t feel bad for those fans as they get to storm the field and film some new Tik Toks as Syracuse survives and wins 27-24.
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