Welcome back, Fake Nunes fans. The analytics staff is hard at work as the Syracuse Orange move back into the 2021-22 ACC Basketball season. Let’s get to the preview of the next Syracuse opponent...
Opponent: Virginia Cavaliers
Location: Charlottesville, VA
Students: 16,723 students
The 2021-22 Fake Nunes Equation of Tumult (#FNET)
College basketball is full of metrics that no one really fully understands so we’ll continue to give you more ridiculousness with this year’s revised FNET metric.
Head Coach Casual Bench Attire:
Tony Bennett’s team seems to have lost something since he went from suburban housewife darling to typical suburban dad
Jim Boeheim has those casual Friday insurance rep vibes going on the sidelines.
Advantage: Syracuse. It’s hard to go from heartthrob to heartburn Tony.
Syracuse will go with the standard home look while Virginia has this on-brand bland blue look going on.
Basketball Program Hashtag:
None vs #GoHoos
We know who wins this but let’s take a moment to acknowledge this part of UVA’s twitter bio: “Humility - Passion - Unity - Servanthood - Thankfulness”. Is this a social media account for a basketball team or a company selling their kitchen wall decor?
Best Overseas Team Name:
We look at where alums are playing pro basketball and determine the coolest name using our secret super-scientific formula.
AX Armani Exchange Milan- Italian Lega Basket Serie A (Devon Hall) vs King Szczecin- Polish EBL (Malachi Richardson)
Of course we use Malachi here just in case any Virginia fans end up reading this....however it’s the holidays and you can’t go wrong with Armani Exchange.
As you’d expect this Virginia team loves to play slow-tempo games and rely on the pack-line defense. The difference this year is that the Cavaliers are struggling to score. Can they turn this one ugly enough to keep the Orange from reaching 65 points? You know Kiheil Clark is going to be a nuisance so even though Syracuse should win easily this game is likely to get dragged into the mud. Jesse Edwards gets a crucial offensive rebound basket in the final minute to seal the win for the Orange and start 2022 off right.