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#FakeNunes previews Syracuse vs. Houston in the Sweet Sixteen

Phi Slamma Bad Mamma Jamma

Syracuse v West Virginia Photo by Joe Robbins/NCAA Photos via Getty Images

Welcome back, Fake Nunes fans. We’ve come down to the final 16 teams in the country so let’s get right to it.

Opponent: Houston Cougars

Location: Houston, Tex.

Students: 37, 291 students who don’t realize they are at a track school

The 2020-21 Fake Nunes Equation of Tumult (#FNET)

You wanted something more ridiculous than RPI and the NCAA gave you NET. We give you more ridiculousness so we’re bringing back a revised FNET metric.

Head Coach Bench Attire and Mask:

Kelvin Sampson gives off major Dad vibes on the sideline with the giant Jumpman logo polo.

NCAA Basketball: South Florida at Houston Troy Taormina-USA TODAY Sports

Turn this photo of Jim Boeheim smiling into a NFT and let’s make some money

NCAA Basketball: NCAA Tournament-Syracuse at West Virginia Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

Advantage: Syracuse

NBA 2K Playability:

The Buddy Boeheim ratings boost is still real and actually pushes him on the level with Quentin Grimes

Advantage: Push

Basketball Program Hashtag:

None vs #FortheCity and #GoCoogs

It’s the old two-hashtag problem popping up again. Either of those is fine by themselves but together it’s just meh. Still beats nothing.

Advantage: Houston

ACC Social Media Favorites:

DeJon Jarreau vs Marek Dolezaj

It’s the most-talked about hip in Indiana against the most-talked about Slovak in Indiana

Advantage: Syracuse

Boeheim Jacket Mask Toss Meter

NCAA Basketball: Clemson at Syracuse Rich Barnes-USA TODAY Sports

1.1/10 Did you see that smile up above? This man is cool as a cucumber these days.


On one hand Buddy Buckets was doing a lot of media all week...on the other hand the NCAA cost us Buddy Donuts. No one takes our donuts from us. Cuse by a bakers dozen.