As you sat on the couch working remotely for what feels like the millionth day in a row, did you stare off into the world outside through your window and go, “What I need is a personalized video message from Hall of Fame Syracuse Orange men’s basketball coach Jim Boeheim”?
Well today’s your lucky day!
I've joined up with the good people @bookcameo. It provides me with the opportunity to create personalized video messages for @Cuse_MBB fans. Proceeds will go to a great cause -- @JJB_Foundation. https://t.co/zwZX2wkiuw— Jim Boeheim (@therealboeheim) August 19, 2020
For those new to the Cameo game, you pay for a personalized message from a celebrity, mostly YouTubers, professional athletes (or just former Syracuse athletes), and whatever an influencer is. Jim Boeheim will be using the site for charity, however, which is great. So if you’re now considering plunking down the $200 for a personalized message, but don’t know what you want it to say, we’ve got plenty of ideas.
“[YOU] don’t know your business.”
Certainly Jim thinks you don’t know what you’re doing, and now you can hear it directly from him. Or extend the quote to a friend, so Jim can tell THEM they don’t know their business instead.
“Not 10 Fucking Games” / “OVERRATED?”
Don’t even need to change these if you don’t want to. But if you’re looking for a way to creatively nudge your boss that you deserve that big promotion, this could be an option.
“I’m sure there’s a couple of Denny’s down there”
Know someone that lives in a remote area? This one could be for you. Or fill in a different word for “Denny’s.” The possibilities — provided Jim approves — are nearly endless.
Disloyal Idiot/He’s An Idiot
Feel free to suggest edits to the following, from Boeheim’s famed comments to Andy Katz.
“I’ll answer anybody’s question but yours. Because you’re an idiot, and a really disloyal person. I have a few other things I could add, but I’m not gonna.”
“If I had anyone else he wouldn’t play a minute”
For that last resort person in your life, let Coach tell them how you really feel about your friendship.
Pick any of these iterations to alter to fit your needs. If Jim can claim numerous things are the “most ridiculous” then you can certainly pick just one.
“That’s why they make scoreboards”
Win a fantasy football league or a big bet with a friend, and now they’re complaining about it? Have Coach Boeheim tell them to suck it up, as he subtly did with UNC-Asheville’s postgame complaints back in 2012.
“Michael Graham, in front of 19,000 people, punched my player” / “Today, the best team didn’t win.”
... or, if YOU are the bitter friend suffering defeat, opt for this one instead to make you feel better (and piss off the victor).
Anything about man-to-man defense
Okay, let’s kill that productivity this afternoon. What are some others we left out?