That’s right, baby. It’s your boys (#FakeNunes) and we’re back to bring you the only weekly preview you didn’t know you needed, but actually do need because without it you wouldn’t be ready for a Syracuse Orange gameday.... or something like that. Let’s get to the preview for Week 2 and do the #jokesandgarbage thing we do.
Opponent: Maryland Terrapins
Location: College Park, Maryland — not to be confused with the much more important College Park area in Atlanta
Students: 41,000- about 80% of which tried to get into Georgetown
The 2019 Fake Nunes Statistical Index (#FNSI)
Once again we bring you categories that no other preview will give you because that’s what we do best.
The debut of the new all-white look which is so fresh, so clean.
All white everything.— Syracuse Football (@CuseFootball) September 4, 2019
Maryland is the Under Armour Oregon Ducks so they are likely to wear something pretty unusual. And no, the state flag as a jersey is not a good idea.
Advantage: Syracuse because saying you’re New York’s College Team is better than wearing it on your helmet
Strength & Conditioning Coach Last Man Standing Match:
Something new for this year is to compare the two S&C coaches and tell you which one would win a Last Man Standing match. This week it’s Sean Edinger against Ryan Davis, newly arrived at Maryland, after, ya know.
Advantage: Edinger has both the experience and the beard advantage this week
Football Program Hashtag:
#OITNF vs #MAXIMIZEIT #FTT and #LOCKedIn
We like the idea of maximizing but what exactly is It in this scenario? Is this the tagline to the upcoming “It” sequel? Are we sure you want to lock in Mike Locksley with his head coaching record? Why must schools complicate these things?
Advantage: Push because #FTT (Fear the Turtle) would have been enough to win but the other two just water it down
Pop Culture Alum: Each week we’ll compare alums who are relevant in pop culture
Jeff Kurkjian vs Tim Kurkjian
We’ve got a father-son battle for the first time in the index, with established baseball writer and personality Tim going up against his son Jeff, who hosts morning radio in Las Vegas and just called the MLB Celebrity Softball Game, taking after his dad.
Advantage: Jeff, because when the dad sends both kids to ‘Cuse, you know the Orange won this a long time ago.
Overly Optimistic SU Fan Prediction from @MrSUFootball
Look folks, you predict 10 wins correctly and you absolutely get to return for a second season. I mean can any of you prove that @MrSUFootball wasn’t the reason that Syracuse won 10 games last year.
Hey y’all, hope you savored week 1 because it came and went too fast. Try not to look ahead and live in the moment and enjoy the build up to every weekend’s game. It’s just a special, special time right now on the sports calendar and in SU fan hood. So my beautiful prediction will be Cuse 38 and Maryland 7.
Here are my four downs of reasoning.:
1) Cuse defense are bulldogs with a big bark- after we chewed and spit out the Liberty offense in their biggest game in program history and held them to 0 points, I didn’t really want to predict a td against the best defense in the country. However, I’ll give Maryland 7 point after their 79-0 win over Solvay High School over the weekend.
2) Tommy Gun will pass for over 250 yards and 4tds and be more accurate and on time with his throws. The receivers are finally all healthy and another week of reps should get this dynamic lineup just prancing and dancing their way to the endzone all day.
3) Underdog role- even though we are the best team in the country, the point spread favors Maryland and puts us as the “underdog” which IMO is when we play the best. While Coach Taylor from FNL was motivating he can’t touch how inspiring Coach Babers is on a daily basis. Anytime he speaks I simply can’t keep a dry eye
4) This is for the fans, don’t eat breakfast tacos or anything harsh the morning of the game. If you resemble anything like me aka the biggest Syracuse football fan from the Onondaga County boundaries to the Pacific coastline, your stomach will be in knots all morning and your heart in your throat knowing College Gameday is on the line. That’s all for this week folks, finish the week strong and my goodness my goodness enjoy and savor week 2. Legoooooo
“Clear eyes, empty stomachs, can’t lose”
New for 2019
The Fist-Pump TD counter where we keep track of all of Syracuse’s offensive touchdowns on the season. Get the official t-shirt here and keep beating up the beat!
Current Fist Pump TD Counter: 3
and after last week we’re adding the Sackacuse Tally to the #FakeNunes previews.
Set the meter to 8 after last week and let’s hope that number grows exponentially again this week.
The Official #FakeNunes Game Prediction:
For being such a close game according to the spread, the Index likes the Orange in a lot of key areas. Ultimately, #FakeNunes keeps rolling, with a close 30-27 game to keep us sweating.