If you can remember back to Jim Boeheim’s press conference at the ACC Media Days, the Syracuse Orange head coach discussed a variety of topics concering his team and the state of college basketball. When the conversation switched to his son Buddy Boeheim and his given name (Jack), Coach Boeheim offered this take

“Jack Boeheim. Nobody calls him that. Teachers at school, friends, I don’t think anybody calls him that. I never call him that. Juli gives nicknames to everybody. Buddy. Sissy (Buddy’s twin sister, Jamie.) Jimmy is JJ, but he doesn’t have a great nickname. He’s at Cornell, they don’t go by nicknames at Cornell. He probably goes by James there.”

“They don’t go by nicknames at Cornell”

“They don’t go by nicknames at Cornell”

“They don’t go by nicknames at Cornell”

“They don’t go by nicknames at Cornell”

....well good readers of this website, for at least one game they will. I present to you the nicknames for the 2018 Cornell Big Red basketball team

#1 Matt “Harshy” Harshany - Matt walked into the Cornell hockey locker room by mistake and it was either this or “Harsher”. Have to respect the hockey nickname convention rules folks.

#2 Jake “Killer” Kuhn - you need some instant offense off the bench, just call on the Killer.

#3 ”The Real” Jimmy Boeheim - we need Jimmy to go classic 2nd generation wrestling heel.

#4 Troy “Nard Dog” Whiteside - if you didn’t see this one coming, you need to brush up on your #jokesandgarbage.

#5 Bryan “The King” Knapp - because you know BK, Burger King. Get it......get it?

#10 “Money” Matt Morgan - fitting for Cornell’s best player who is pretty clutch from the perimeter.

Rich Barnes-USA TODAY Sports

#11 Terrance “T-Mac” McBride - not every nickname is clever or original folks.

#12 Kobe “Ivy Mamba” Dickson - chefs kiss

#13 Thurston “Millionaire” McCarty - look there was this old tv show with a character named Thurston and I’m sure Cornell students can find clips online.

#20 Chaz “Daddy” Mack - he’ll make you wanna jump jump!

#21 Riley “Drizzy” Voss - because “water used to be the tap, not the Voss”. Ain’t no complaints with this one.

#22 Josh “J-Dub” Warren - if your last name starts with “W” this nickname is a given.

Rich Barnes-USA TODAY Sports

#23 ”Gentleman” Joel Davis - ¹⁄₂ of the Big Red Express tag team w/ Steven Julian.

#24 Max “Hot Rod” Samberg - he’s a stuntman you know.

#25 Dean “The Dream” Noll - known for his low-post move the “Cayuga Lake Shake”.

#32 Jack “Commissioner” Gordon - that one’s for you DC fanboys. He’s responsible for sending out the distress signal from the bench.

#33 ”Stunning” Steven Julian - the other half of the Big Red Express team.

There you go, now at least some people at Cornell have nicknames.....at least for one game. Since we’re full of the holiday spirit, you’re welcome to use them the rest of the year Big Red.