NORTH CAROLINA IS HIRING GERG AND NO, THIS IS NOT A JOKE

There are some days it feels the sports world looks up TNIAAM and goes “what can we do to ensure you guys have fun?”

Oh, Mack Brown, you old fool.

First off, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OH MY GOD THIS IS GREAT.

Second off, why, oh why, can’t the Syracuse Orange play UNC this year? Please ACC, we don’t ask for much, but this would make up for most of the stupid stuff you’ve done to us so far. And trading the Heels for Duke (our actual 2019 crossover) wouldn’t really make much of a difference.

There’s just so much stuff to get out, and it’s truly unfair that we don’t get to let out a decade of frustration on GERG’s defense by scoring 70-plus. We never had the chance at redemption against him in previous stints as a defensive coordinator post-Syracuse. This is our chance to completely bury any memory of Greg Robinson as the Orange’s head coach.

GERG is the man who gave us “snowball into something that can catch fire.” And “we need to win just to win.” And numerous other Gregisms that we can finally laugh at now, but absolutely killed us as at the time. His terrible rein sunk the program, made us laughingstocks, could’ve stopped us from getting into the ACC if not for Doug Marrone’s turnaround, and also caused the constant underlying rage of this site’s current managing editor. It also helped birth this site in other ways. But that’s not something he can truly take credit for...

But seriously, Bill C went on a TIRADE last PAPN, saying that Mack Brown could hypothetically work (but it wouldn’t) if he hired young, exciting coordinators with UNC’s resources. This is the exact opposite of that.

Really, we should all start sending UNC copies of the Little Engine that Could. Probably the most real reading any UNC football players will do this upcoming year!