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#FakeNunes Preview: Syracuse Orange vs NC State Wolfpack

This is what they call a big game ladies and gentlemen

NCAA Football: North Carolina at Syracuse Rich Barnes-USA TODAY Sports

If it’s Wednesday, then you know it’s time for #FakeNunes preview. All the #jokesandgarbage you need to get ready for this week’s Syracuse Orange game.

Opponent: North Carolina State Wolf Pack

Location: Raleigh, NC

Students: 33,375

The 2018 Fake Nunes Statistical Index (#FNSI)

We’ve come up with some new categories this year because if we’ve learned anything from the NCAA this summer it’s to create a metric you own the rights to and no one knows how you calculate the formulas.

Uniforms:

Barring any unnecessary platinum, this is a no-contest. NC State uniforms look something out of a football movie that doesn’t spring for the NFL license deal.

Advantage: Syracuse*

*unless platinum appears

NCAA Football: North Carolina State at Clemson Joshua S. Kelly-USA TODAY Sports

NCAA Football Playability:

You’d expect NC State to get the “they were better” last year bump and Ryan Finley’s the chief beneficiary. We’ve talked a lot about Eric Dungey being the guy who would make Syracuse a better NCAA choice, but this week he might be the 2nd best QB.

Advantage: NC State

Football Program Hashtag:

#OITNF vs #1Pack1Goal

If there’s only 1 Pack, are we so sure it’s not the Nevada Wolf Pack? And why are they trying to score a goal? That’s not really helpful in soccer, nevermind football.

Advantage: Syracuse

Pop Culture Alum: Each week we’ll compare alums who are relevant in pop culture

Steve Croft vs Dr. Jerry Punch

We’re back to television this week and we’ve got a 60 Minutes contributor going up against an emergency room physician/broadcaster. There’s no question that Kroft does some great work, but I’m pretty sure he hasn’t saved any lives while on the job.

Advantage: NC State

Overly Optimistic SU Fan Prediction from @MrSUFootball

We’re tired of all your #honoryourcontract and #disloyalidiot comments so each week the most optimistic Syracuse Football fan we know gives you his predictions. Current Prediction Record (5-2).

Syracuse 33 NC State 10. Here are my four downs of reasoning.

1) All of the nights: first primetime home Saturday game in 8 years. I get chills just typing that. Tailgating under the street lights, moon rising over the dome vs an ACC top 25 rival. Yeeeeeeeeeeee.

2) Belk/Sunbowl/Music City Bowl play-in game?: While I just want to win 6 games and make it back to a bowl game this could be a play in game to some of the acc top tier bowl games. That will be enough to get these boys motivated and frothing at the mouth to inflict the pain necessary to keep the win in Syracuse.

3) Quarterbacks- imo we have the two best in the whole damn country (might get fined for that potty word) but I’m emotionally behind whoever can help us win this game and the remaining ones. Eric/Tommy are the two most talented quarterbacks in the country so we are lucky to have both play.

4) 6- I talked above about bowl games, but I can’t stress enough how many nights I cried myself to sleep over last few years when we were eliminated from winning 6 games. I want to rejoice as soon as possible and get to 6. No better time then Saturday night in primetime to show the world. P.S. if you get a chance vote in my poll on my twitter feed, trying to bring back the late 90s Chicago bulls theme on 3rd down. @cusetik says if I get 50% of the vote they will try bring it back. That’s all folks, enjoy we have 5 left and 6 if we are lucky.

Folks if you aren’t fired up after reading that, call 9-1-1 because you’ve got no pulse.

NFL: Houston Texans at Jacksonville Jaguars Reinhold Matay-USA TODAY Sports

Jalen Ramsey tells us about the opponents’ QB

If you thought Jalen would keep his opinions to NFL QBs, we’re happy to announce that we got him to speak about SU’s 2018 opponents. Last week he was right about Dazz Newsome doing damage so let’s see what he’s got for this week

Ryan Finley is good enough to play for a few NFL teams....hey do you think he could just fly over to London instead of heading to Syracuse this weekend?”

Victory Cigar Meter

6/10: Doeren just seems like the kind of guy who will do something obnoxious any chance he can get.

Babers Viral Post-Game Locker Room Speech Meter

10/10: A win here and the Orange are bowl eligible. It’s a primetime game and Dino knows he can deliver something for the late-night highlight shows. If Syracuse wins, this speech will be epic.

Prediction:

There’s something about night games in the Dome against ranked opponents....call us suckers but this just feels like a game Syracuse sneaks out.