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#FakeNunes: Syracuse vs. Miami

If it's not fit to print, it's #Fake Nunes!

Opponent: No. 8 Miami Hurricanes (5-0)

Location: Coral Gables, Fla.

Students: 17,000

The Musical History of Miami Football

Over the past 35 years — for better AND for worse — no football program has shaped modern college football more than the University of Miami Hurricanes. During this period, The U has produced 5 national champions, countless first-round NFL draft picks, and enough bad blood and schadenfreude to fill the tens of thousands of empty seats in ProPlayer Landshark Sun Life Hard Rock Stadium!

On the field, Miami had a historically great run in the ‘80s and early ‘90s and is showing signs of a modern-day resurgence. But to look at Miami purely from a football perspective ignores the fact that they did much to shape the blending of hip-hop and rap culture into American sport. In fact, from 1985-2005, they may have done more than any program in history (collegiate or professional) to create a culture that was intertwined with the rap artists of their hometown. And while one can bristle at The U’s antics during their heyday, you actually have to offer them a debt of gratitude, as it certainly raised the collective profile of Miami's rap and hip hop scene — which I would rank as No. 3 in the nation behind only No. 1 NYC and No. 2 L.A. (and one ahead of No. 4 Oakland - feel free to agree or disagree with my BCS rap semifinal rankings in the comments below).

As such, #FakeNunes is proud to present "The Musical History of Miami Football!” Take out your tasting notes as we pair the modern eras of Miami Hurricane football with their South Florida rap equivalents similar to how John pairs a creamy malt and yeast-derived fruit ale with a hot plate of Chicken Wings! Bon Appetit!

The Jimmy Johnson Era (1984 - 1988): 2 Live Crew/Uncle Luke

Miami quickly evolved into what we know as "The U" immediately following the first of their five national championships. The introduction of Jimmy Johnson as head football coach coincided with the emergence of the undisputed kings of Miami rap - 2 Live Crew. Originally from California, 2 Live Crew exploded on the music scene with their "booty bass" style once Luther Campbell (Uncle Luke) moved the group to Miami. And like The U, 2 Live Crew was notable for immensely entertaining, dirty and expletive-laden play on "the field.” And unchecked morality and legal trouble off of it.

The Dennis Erickson Era (1989 - 1994): Poison Clan

Erickson's Canes picked right up from Jimmy Johnson upon his departure, and the former Washington State head coach did little to change the culture inside The U -- helping to maintain momentum and secure an additional two national championships in 1989 and '91. Similarly, Poison Clan - a protege of Luther Campbell -- carried on the booty bass style of Miami rap literally "Shaking What Ya Mama Gave Ya." The good times in the 305 kept rolling!

The Butch Davis Era (1995 - 2000): Vanilla Ice

Can you ever have too much of a good thing? Can you eventually jump the shark?

Yes. Yes you can.

Butch Davis took over the Hurricanes in 1995 following a decade of overindulgence (and the discovery of a major Pell Grant fraud case that led to a 1995 postseason ban and the elimination of 31 scholarships between 1996 and '98). The Canes suffered during this era when The U's profile was mainstream, but the results were often farcical. Similarly, Miami's rap scene suffered from mainstream exposure and descended into the farcical with the introduction of every suburban white kid's favorite '90s rapper: Vanilla Ice.

The Larry Coker Era (2001 - 2006): Uncle Luke

Miami football needed a savior who could put the ‘Canes back to their place of prominence, and at least initially, Larry Coker delivered. A fifth National Championship in 2001 appeared to reestablish Miami as the preeminent college football program, and on the field the ‘Canes looked and acted like the Miami of old.

At that time, Miami's rap scene celebrated the return of Uncle Luke with the release of "Scandalous: All Star Compilation." As the new century dawned, it looked like Miami of old was the Miami of new.

But as Coker's tenure wore on, the Canes couldn't quite match their lofty expectations. Yet as results dipped, their antics on the field continued =- highlighted by a brawl with FIU in 2006 that (in part) led the increasingly beleaguered Miami administration to let Coker go.

The Randy Shannon Era (2007 - 2010): Buckwheat Boyz "Peanut Butter and Jelly Time"

And you thought The Dome was empty...

The dismissal of Coker, the demolition of the Orange Bowl & move to (then-) Sun Life Stadium, and the Nevan Shapiro scandal were the notable moments in Miami football during the second half of the first decade of the 21st Century. In fact, under Shannon, the U were a shell of themselves on the field, and the old Miami act of the ‘80s and ‘90s was just plain silly. While released in the mid ‘90s, The Buckwheat Boyz song "Peanut Butter and Jelly" was a fitting soundtrack to the absurdity.

The Al Golden Era (2011 - 2015): DJ Khaled "Suffering From Success"

The introduction of Al Golden marked another attempt for Miami to re-emerge from its least successful period since the late seventies. Golden reset the program, and put in place the foundation for a new era of Hurricane football that focused more on the product on the field than the antics off the field. Yet the bar set by the great teams of the ‘80s and ‘90s was so great, Golden couldn't quite meet the level of success required to stay in Miami. As Golden failed to meet expectations, DJ Khaled released an appropriately titled album "Suffering From Success" which leveraged the talents of Miami rap legend Rick Ross and others, and offered a departure from the booty bass style of Miami rap to the more dance-oriented style that is prominent today.

The Mark Richt Era (2016 - present): Flo Rida

The 2016 introduction of Mark Richt was a masterstroke for Miami football. A former Miami quarterback and former head coach of Georgia, Richt was a known entity with a great track record, and one who instantly took over the culture of the program. Richt's teams play entertaining football and largely keep the extracurricular stuff away from the spotlight. Miami football in 2017 plays with an attractive and effective style that is in the mold of the excellent Mark Richt, but may not satisfy "The U" purists who demand a bit more "booty bass" with their football.

In the 2017 Miami music scene, no one exemplifies today's Miami football like Flo Rida. He too is a known entity with a solid track record, and was one of a number of artists to evolve Miami's rap genre (along with DJ Khaled and Pitbull) from booty bass to EDM-Hop (dance-oriented rap/hip-hop). Like Richt's Hurricanes, Flo Rida is inarguably successful and liked, but thought of by rap purists in parts of the 305 as something less than the raw and more explosive acts of earlier decades.


Coach's Film Study

Today's Film: Chef

As the head coach of a Power 5 football team, you all know I don't have too much free time on my hands to eat. Now don't get me wrong, I love good food, but like my offense, my food has to be FAST.

The "base formation" for my food tastes is the "trips right bubble screen" of gastronomy: the bologna sandwich. It's simple, repeatable, and eats up hunger in small bites. The bologna sandwich deserves our respect, and we will give it respect.

When time in the pocket (a.k.a. my kitchen) allows, I go straight for the fried noodles, which was my victory meal of choice on Friday night/Saturday early morning after our outstanding victory over Clemson! WHOSE HOUSE?!?!?

But if you really want something that is a home run every time... something that I would take from the picnic to the classroom any day of the week and twice on game day, there is nothing, I MEAN NOTHING that beats the Cuban Sandwich: the glorious mash-up of marinated pork, ham, cheese, pickle and mustard on grilled sweet bread.

Unsurprisingly, Miami is the epicenter of the Cuban Sandwich, and is the setting for "Chef" a highly entertaining and under-the-radar film written, directed and starting Jon Favreau. It features an excellent ensemble cast that includes Dustin Hoffman, Scarlett Johansson, John Leguizamo, Robert Downey Jr., and Sofia Vergara.

Carl Casper (Jon Favreau) with his son Percy and wife Inez (Sofia Vergara) in "Chef"

Favreau's character, Carl Casper, is a tremendously talented, forward-thinking and egocentric Chef who grows frustrated in having to cook a tired "greatest hits" menu at an established yet stale upscale California restaurant. Upon receiving a scathing review by a well-followed food blogger, Casper goes into meltdown mode on social media - not realizing the power of the platform. His meltdown leads to his dismissal and a loss of professional credibility.

Broken, Casper heads to Miami to reconnect with his ex-wife Inez and preteen son Percy. While there, he begrudgingly reconditions a broken-down food truck, and with Percy with him, begins serving Cuban sandwiches and yucca fries. The reconnection with his son and Cuban food rekindles his love of cooking and family, and "Chef" turns into a heartwarming story of Casper's rebirth as an artist, a father, and a husband. It also makes you DAMN hungry for a Cuban sandwich, so have a few handy before breaking open this thoroughly enjoyable film!

Four oranges (out of five)


The #FakeNunes Statistical Index (#FNSI)

F&B: (Food and Beverage). Ok, Coach Babers just got the mouth watering over Cuban sandwiches, and Miami is the the place to get a Cuban — or it's sibling, the Media Noche. The Cuban and Latin influence that dominates Miami is prevalent in its cuisine which brings together hearty, savory dishes in quantities unmatched in the U.S.

Cafe Versailles - Little Havana

But Miami is not just home to a great sandwich. No, the combination of climate, access to tropical ingredients and seafood offers Miami residents a huge array of great dining options from the simple (Cafe Versailles and other outstanding spots in Little Havana) to the luxurious (Fi'lia, Bazaar Mar). It is a foodie's paradise.

Combine that with the famous nightlife of the city, and Syracuse simply can not compete. But hey, that's what visits to Bubbe are for, right?

ADVANTAGE: Miami

Best. Tailgating. Spot. Ever.

Tailgate Efficiency: What happens to the tailgate scene when your students have to travel 23 miles to the stadium, are hit with a ton of restrictive rules around drinking, RVs, etc, AND have a TON of incredible ways to spend their Saturday?

It becomes a dead zone.

ADVANTAGE: Syracuse

Adj. Uniform Coolness: For the past several weeks, Syracuse has made excellent use of Orange, and avoided platinum altogether. I'm getting lulled into a false sense of security for sure, and I am sure we are going to break out an all platinum combination just in time for the Wake Forest game. I'll enjoy it while I can.

Meanwhile, Miami has managed to stay true to its basic uniform style, and even has worked in a green home jersey that looks even better than their traditional orange. ADVANTAGE (only until SU abandons the current Nike design): Miami

4th String F.I.: Miami's marginal fan base spends more time thinking about what Speedo to wear on South Beach than it does on the 4-deep, but with 4- and 5-star talent from South Florida all over the Canes' roster, I give them a slim edge. ADVANTAGE: Miami

Hot Seat: We should probably retire the hot seat for a while... unless the hot seat represents the burning hole in Coach Babers’s chair from all of those SEC boosters' longing glances. ADVANTAGE: Miami

FACEPALM: Dear God, I know we just beat the #2 team in the nation, but I can't help but feel a little face palm coming on if we don't shock the college football world again this weekend. I no longer believe we can win, I TRUST we can win!

But with that said, our opponents are undefeated, ranked No. 8, and have a legitimate path to the CFB playoff. Time to kill some more dreams!!! ADVANTAGE: Miami

Grandpa Edgar: "Shoot. You boys did it last weekend! Nice job.

Here's the thing though. The GREAT teams do that night in and night out. Nebraska used to take down Notre Dame one week and Oklahoma the next, and while you earned some respect, you aren't Tom Osborne's gift to college football yet. Keep your head down and keep working."

ADVANTAGE: Miami

Swift/Perry Index: Even at the height of the Big East, Syracuse and Miami rarely played a tightly-contested game for the conference title. We had our moments, but on the balance Miami had our number more often than not. And for that, I think we are the more bitter and antagonistic of the two fan bases. ADVANTAGE: Syracuse

Iso #DISRESPEKT: Miami is ranked #8, but there remains a lingering resentment that the program is still under-represented in the national conversation. Syracuse just got showered with national love for the first time in so long. ADVANTAGE: Miami

Narcissism+: There remains a segment of the Miami fan base (small in number though it may be) that clings on to the culture of "its all about The U.” Here in Syracuse, we aren't that used to the attention we've been showered with over the past five days. Are we back in the conversation? Does Kirk Herbstreit think we're cute? Do we need to ditch the sweatpants for cool kid clothes??? THE ANXIETY IS KILLING ME!!! ADVANTAGE: Miami

EDSBS IJ Factor: (Every Day Should Be Saturday Inside Joke Factor). What a difference one game makes! Syracuse got the attention of the college football world with the shocking upset of Clemson just as a glorious gif emerged of Eric Dungey pouring grape soda over himself. Add these two together, and you now have THE FRONTRUNNER FOR EDSBS' PEOPLE'S HEISMAN TROPHY. ADVANTAGE: Syracuse

East Coast Bias +/-: Are the Yankees still playing?

(checks ESPN)

Yes, the Yankees are still playing

ADVANTAGE: Miami (I suppose)

Tradition/Culture Index: On one hand, Miami has five National Championships and a well-known identity. On the other, the Championships and identity are based on a 20-year period of dominance and self-destruction that constantly had the school's administration desperately looking to curtail the program.

Syracuse by comparison is still defined by a bygone era that never scaled the heights of Miami, but it was stable and largely something to be consistently proud of. ADVANTAGE: Even

Prediction

The #FNSI indicates that this one will be rather close. The Hurricanes are for real, but Syracuse has closed the gap and improved across a number of key variable. They should fear no one at this stage in the season, but may not quite repeat the magic in the Carrier Dome last weekend. Miami 27, Syracuse 24.