We've already compared ACC Football Programs to MLB Playoff Contenders and EPL Squads, so with SummerSlam upon us, let's compare them to...WWE Attitude Era Wrestlers....
Clemson Tigers - Kurt Angle
They project an All-American image, they win plenty of times, yet there is something about them that doesn’t connect to those outside the fan base. (Well maybe we know a couple of reasons why) I'm sure it baffles Dabo when people respond this way, much like it did Kurt Despite the wins, the success, they still illicit chants of "You Suck" everywhere they go….and well sometimes something a little stronger than "You Suck".
Florida State Seminoles - Steve Austin
The Champ who doesn’t respect authority and has a penchant for wearing fanny packs with jorts and drinking cheap beer? Oh hell yeah that's FSU. Like Stone Cold,the Noles certainly don’t trust anyone (Hi #FSUTwitter) and have no problem ignoring all of your rules as long as the result is a victory. Those who don't like what FSU does, often end up on the receiving end of some violence.
Duke Blue Devils - Shane McMahon
Dad runs things so he lets his kid join the fun and you laugh when his sweater-vest wearing cronies show up to have his back. But something strange happens and the kid doesn’t want to be a joke anymore and uses his $ to actually get the right guidance to be good. It starts by beating easy opponents, but damn if they don't hold their own against the top competitors and earn your respect.
Miami Hurricanes - Oh this one has to be The Rock right? Well, it doesn't matter what you think Canes fans, it’s Bret Hart
Big East Miami was The Rock- electrifying, brash, and above all, a winner. ACC Miami is more like Bret Hart- trying to do the same things that worked 10 years ago and expecting to still be cool. Like The Hitman, Miami seems to be the last one to realize that they just aren’t the coolest, or the baddest, around anymore. For the school that defined swagger, they've become what The Rock would call a "bunch of jabronis".
Louisville Cardinals - Edge
The Rated R Superstar fits perfectly with the school led by Bobby Petrino. They started off as a secondary character, Edge as part of the Brood, and football a distant second to Cardinals’ hoops, but have risen to become a major threat. They play up the too cool to care bad guy role, but as time passes they have earned the respect of their opponents.
Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets - Mick Foley
Like Mick walking around in his flannel shirts and sweats, GT could care less about outward appearances. It doesn’t matter that no one else wears uniforms by Russell Athletic, or that none of the other P5 schools run the wishbone, Paul Johnson just shrugs his shoulders and keeps shuffling along. There’s also there’s a pretty good chance that when you face GT, like Foley,someone is going to suffer numerous injuries.
Boston College Eagles - HHH
A really snobby individual who the others could beat at will until they join forces with some more popular friends to rise in stature. They suffer when some of those friends fade from the spotlight, but enjoy an upswing when they drop the pretentious act and decide to just "Be A Dude". No one liked elitist HHH, but plenty of people loved DX-era HHH and I think you can picture Addazio telling anyone complaining about his offense to "Suck It"
Virginia Tech Hokies - The Undertaker
BeamerBall means that even if you win, you’ll be feeling the impact for a long time and like "The Phenom", even in a down year, VT seems to pull off one major win like they did at Ohio State in 2014. When Va Tech loses a night game at Lane Stadium, fans are left in shock just like this fan watching The Undertaker finally lose at Wrestlemania.
Virginia Cavaliers - Kane
If VT is Undertaker,then UVA needs to be their "Little Brother" when it comes to football. Supposed to be this big monster, but does anyone really fear them? All we hear about is how they are on the verge, and have the recruits ready to breakthrough to the top, but when the games start they fall right back to the middle of the pack. The name still means enough to draw attention, but others are more consistent threats.
North Carolina Tar Heels - Shawn Michaels
Talented, but troubled. A lifer in the WWE, Michaels provided a lot of outstanding moments, but also caused his share of problems. Nearly every year UNC has the talent to win, but it’s a question of them getting out of their own way. Could this be the year they deliver Sweet Chin Music to the rest of the ACC?
N.C. State Wolfpack - The Big Show
Full of hype. Beats up on a lot of smaller folks to pad their record. Seems like people always marvel at NC State before each Fall, and by the end of the year promise they will never do that again...but then they do it over and over and over again. Maybe this is the year....but it's probably not.
Wake Forest Demon Deacons - XPac
The smallest star of the Attitude Era matches well with the smallest school in the ACC. Despite being smaller, they’ve both cashed in with impressive victories over bigger, badder opponents. They just are unable to sustain that success over long stretches.
Pittsburgh Panthers - The APA
Not the prettiest team to watch, but the goal seems to just bludgeon people no matter the outcome. The Panthers like the APA have a habit of controlling their opponents, only to fall short at the end. Win or lose, you can count on a lot of post-competition beers.
Syracuse Orange - Christian
"Brother" of Edge fits best with the Orange because the Cuse and Louisville are linked by previous conference affiliation and their successful hoops programs. Christian is regarded by his peers as a tough opponent, but his runs of success were limited to brief spots. His Peeps are willing to hold onto those moments despite the overall record, much like many Syracuse fans cling to past success.
Notre Dame Fighting Irish - John Cena
Let's face it. ND and Cena win a lot. A lot of people love them, and an even greater number of people hate them. There is very little gray area when it comes to these two, and no matter where you turn, they are going to be all over your television.
Special thanks to Pitt Panthers fan Tim D for his help in compiling this list. Let me know in the comments what other comparisons you can come up with.