Georgetown Hates Puppies

Usually when I'm writing a headline like that, I'm being facetious. But not this time. Quite literally, Georgetown University is "that" dog owner, the one who adopts a dog and then, when they're not willing to put in the work to train them and provide a good home for them, they just dump the pooch back where they found it.

In April of 2012, our community welcomed Jack, Jr. (J.J.) to Georgetown as mascot-in-training. We housed the young puppy while consulting with trainers and experts to ensure that he was adjusting to life on campus.

Since that time, J.J.’s caretaker and walkers have worked to orient him to campus and train him for mascot duties. We also worked with professional trainers to help J.J. learn about life on a busy college campus. Recognizing that the lifestyle of a mascot is exciting and hectic, involving many people, thousands of screaming fans, and regular appearances at events both on and off-campus, we wanted to ensure that our puppy would be happy with this unique lifestyle.

After 15 months of monitoring and training, in consultation with these experts and the breeder, we determined that returning to a home environment is what is best for J.J.

So by itself that's funny. But, being Georgetown, this has turned into a super-serious cluster*** of Georgetownian proportions.

First, read this super-serious article from The Hoya, the school newspaper.

Then, read this super-serious Google Doc official statement from "Keeper of the Georgetown mascot" Christopher Steck...

Then read this super-serious quote:

"When I walk the dogs, there’s a definite ‘Hoya Saxa’ moment every time a person comes up to us. To not have them on campus would really hit the student body hard," Schadler said. "To be able to pet them and play with them is a huge part of being a Hoya. … It’s a piece of our identity that’s missing if we don’t have a bulldog on campus."

We're really gonna miss you when you defect to North Korea, Georgetown. We really will.