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Excusive First-Look At Jim Boeheim's Guide To Traveling The World

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July 14, 2012; Washington, DC, USA; United States assistant coach Jim Boeheim stands on the sidelines during USA team training at the DC Armory. Mandatory Credit: Geoff Burke-US PRESSWIRE
July 14, 2012; Washington, DC, USA; United States assistant coach Jim Boeheim stands on the sidelines during USA team training at the DC Armory. Mandatory Credit: Geoff Burke-US PRESSWIRE

And you thought Jim Boeheim's insight into foreign cultures and international cuisine was limited to his Olympic blog posts? Oh, that's just the tip of the complainy iceberg.

The fine folks over at Curmudgeonly Press have sent over some clips from Boeheim's upcoming tome, "Jim Boeheim's Guide To Traveling The World." The samples I've received are some pretty solid tips and suggestions for surviving in a strange land.

Barcelona, Spain

"If you don't like seafood, don't bother. It's basically 500 really fancy versions of Red Lobster. Without the cheese biscuits!"

Manchester, England

"Pro-tip. Try the Italian restaurants. I know what you're thinking, you're not in Italy, you're in Manchester. But you'd me amazed to find out they can make a mean spaghetti here. Who knew?"

London, England

"Here's some insider knowledge that the locals won't tell you about. There's this big ferris wheel thing. They call it the Eyeball but I've seen enough ferris wheels at the New York State Fair to know one when I see one. It's a little pricy but they've got really nice views of downtown London. At least I think it's downtown. I'm not actually sure. You can see Buckingham Palace and Big Ben, which are also some great secret spots worth checking out."

Rome, Italy

"Everyone raves about the food in Italy. Truthfully, it's very good but I can get much bigger portions at Spaghetti Warehouse and the kids get chicken tenders. The chicken tenders in Rome aren't all they're cracked up to be."

Phuket, Thailand

"What is with everyone and seafood? No thank you."

Paris, France

"You hear a lot about how Paris people don't smell good and are all uptight but I found them to be a mostly pleasant bunch, reminded me of Greensboro in that way. We went up to the top of Eiffel Tower and went to the Louvre. Nice pictures. So many people lined up to see the Mona Lisa, but honestly, what's the big deal? You can buy a Mona Lisa poster at the student bookstore for seven bucks and put it up on your wall. And then you don't even have to wait in line."

Prague, Czach Republic

"The weather was dreary. The people were downtrodden and miserable. The whole vibe of the city was dark and depressing. Five stars, can't recommend enough!"

Dublin, Ireland

"Visited a lot of authentic Irish pubs. Still prefer Kitty Hoynes. Better Irish nachos."

Amsterdam, The Netherlands

"At Devendorf's request, we made a stop here. I don't get what everyone is so excited about. If I wanted to visit a place known for pot smoking, prostitution and small, cramped space where Jews hung out, I'd just move into South Campus."

Venice, Italy

"Onondaga Lake in July."

Santorini, Greece

"Is it so hard to cook a hot dog? I don't care if you're serving fresh fish you caught this morning, it's still fish. Where's Hoffmann's when you need it?"

Shanghai, China

"We went out to a local restaurant and ate a Chinese meal. It wasn't like a P.F. Chang's; it was, you know, more Chinese." (An actual Jim Boeheim quote, by the way)

Belfast, Northern Ireland

"Who knew there were so many Syracuse fans here? All I had to do is say I'm an Orangeman and I was taken in like a brother. Got to go on a lovely walk with fellow SU fans and we talked a lot about our rivalry with the Catholic schools. Gotta love the intensity and fandom."

Seoul, Korea

"Head's up, they don't have California Pizza Kitchens here. Just be aware the first time you go. Wish someone had told me."

Puerto Vallarta, Mexico

"Have I mentioned how much I hate seafood? Absolutely disgusting. No amount of Tangerine Rain Gatorade can get that taste out of your mouth."