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Don't Tase Cuse Bros, Bro

via ABC Action News in Tampa
via ABC Action News in Tampa

It's all fun and games until somebody gets tased in the gut four times. That's what happened at the South Florida game for one Syracuse fan.

Stroman says he was tased in the stomach at least four times by a female police officer after his group of friends was ejected from Raymond James Stadium.

"They (police) did not like us in that section. We were being loud. I think they assumed everyone around us had a problem with us, but they didn't. In fact, we were tailgating with them an hour earlier. We gave them some chicken off of our grill," Stroman told the ABC station in Tampa.

"Unsuspecting guy gets tased at ballgame for no apparent reason" has become the new boy who cried wolf. Especially when the tasee won't stop talking about how he did nothing to provoke it. So my apologies to Cooper Stroman if my bullsh*t detector immediately goes up after reading this, but its my natural response. Let's find out more...

Stroman says he had not been drinking alcohol and was just having fun with his friends. Police spokesperson Laura McElroy told ABC Stroman was "combative" and "belligerent" when asked to leave the stadium, while his friends complied without incident.

Look, I don't know what happened but what's more likely:

Stroman was "just having fun" like he said. He was minding his own business when all of a sudden a Tampa police officer, delirious on the thought of vengeance and destruction, decides to tase him four times for no good reason.


The police officer, who probably is smart enough not to tase innocent people multiple times in broad daylight in the middle of a crowd, acted accordingly due to Stroman's behavior.

Then there's all this business of hiring Tim Donaghy's lawyer, petitions to the governor, driving from Jacksonville to Tampa just to do TV interviews and requests to internal's all too much.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe he and his friends were just minding their own business, quietly discussing politics and gender studies during the game when they were rudely asked to leave by stadium officials. Maybe the police officers saw the Syracuse fans and thought to themselves, "I'm gonna make an example of these jerks even though they didn't do anything wrong." Maybe that did actually happen.

But I'm pretty sure it didn't.