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The Economy Is In Shambles Except For The T-Shirt Sector

This just in...people like the Marathon Men T-shirt:

"This has been an unbelievable shirt. We've never ordered this many before," said SU bookstore Division Merchandise Manager Gail Youmell. "This is our top T-shirt we've ever sold."

Sales of the "Marathon Men" shirts have already almost doubled the amount of "Overrated?!!" shirts, which celebrated former SU guard Gerry McNamara, sold during its entire run, Youmell said.

Upon hearing the news, DOCTOR Gross released the following statement:

Seriously, you don't want to be caught on campus not wearing one of the shirts or being able to provide documented proof that you own the shirt.  Just ask Julie Persaud, sophomore history major:

"I would get the shirt even if they weren't in the (NCAA) Tournament," Persaud said. "It's the cool thing to do. Everyone is getting a shirt."

Julie, if Arinze Onuaku snapped in Memphis on Friday, murdered Blake Griffin on the basketball floor, tore out his innards, set up a spitfire at center court and slowly grilled his small intestines over an open flame and they made a T-shirt about the incident with the slogan "Arinze's BBBQ (The Extra B Is for Blake Griffin)" and everyone was buying them, would you buy one too just to be cool?!?!?

Okay, so would I.  Fair enough.