clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

A Little Lead Never Hurt Anyone...I Think

Who would sell a tainted, possibly-hazardous material to a public institution where children congregate and possibly inhale or ingest said hazardous materials unsuspectingly?

Oh, Syracuse University...right. Carry on...

Cicero-North Syracuse High School, how's that new turf doing?
Mustang school officials have removed a piece of turf from inside a high school athletic practice facility because it contained lead.

The turf was inside the high school's batting practice facility, district spokes-woman Shannon Rigsby said. The turf was removed earlier this month after officials learned it could pose a hazard to students, she said."We're going to err on the side of safety when it comes to our kids," said Mike Clark, the district's athletic director.

The turf had previously been used inside the Carrier Dome, the stadium used by Syracuse University, school officials said.

When did SU become a smooth talking grifter pawning off any potentially-hazardous items on to unsuspecting locals and running off to Tahiti with the profits? Who did we sell our Carrier Dome Escalator To Nowhere to?

Then again, maybe we're going about this turf all wrong. We sold it two years ago according to the article. In the two years since unloaded our tainted turf, the football program has six wins and is disrepair. What if the lead-based poison lurking inside was actually helping us? What if Donovan McNabb was a one-star bum when he arrived at SU and because of the powers within the poisonturf he was transformed into the cannon-armed warrior that he became?

Then again, how do you explain every QB that followed until Andrew Robinson? Nevermind...carry on with our new, untainted turf.