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Ron Burgundy Would've Quit The Team By Now

You've just run through two full-length football practices in full pads and uniform. You've done so many push-ups and wind sprints your arms and legs are jello. You got your clock cleaned once or twice and done the same to a few other guys. You're bleeding. You're panting. You're tired. You're throat is drier than hell.

You need a swig of something cold. Something refreshing. Something you can pour on your sweaty brow for a moment of sweet release.

You need...chocolate milk?

Apparently someone at Washington didn't read their Gatorade contract too closely.
The Huskies are experimenting with a new form of nutritional replacement following practices. Along with giving the usual water and sports drinks to rehydrate and replenish during grueling preseason practices, Washington's football staff is requiring its players to drink a small carton of fat-free chocolate milk.

The decision to implement the program came after a study last fall from scientists at Indiana University that was published in the International Journal of Sports Nutrition and Exercise Metabolism and was supported in part by the Dairy and Nutrition Council.

The small study found no significant difference between using a fluid-replacement drink or chocolate milk for athletes following exercise, with dairy folks touting the nutritional benefits of drinking milk -- chocolate or otherwise.

Naturally, the players were apprehensive. But Coach Willingham stepped in with a reasonable and well-thought-out explanation as to why they should drink a stomach-coating liquid after punishing said organ for eight hours.

"It was good. I love chocolate milk anyway," said Willingham.

As if the Orange didn't need any further incentives to beat Washington opening weekend, now they have the added bonus of not wanting the Huskies to douse their coach in chocolate milk after a victory. You try getting chocolate stains out of the Dome's no picnic.

Besides, as I'm sure you know, milk was a bad choice.