Dear ACC Brothers & Sisters,
Hi! As of right now, the Syracuse Orange are in the hizzy!
You know what, let me start over. I assure you, we don't usually use "hizzy" anymore. I don't know what came over me. I guess we're all just really excited to start this new chapter in Syracuse history. We're looking forward to starting new rivalries in football, basketball, lacrosse and every other sport (except baseball, cause, did I mention lacrosse?).
So, I'm sure you probably know us best for our basketball prowess. We've done fairly well over the last forty years. Five Final Fours. A National Championship. Tons of conference titles and all that jazz. And throughout all of it, there's one guy who has been a part of every success Syracuse has had in that time. James Arthur Boeheim.
You might know him as Jim Boeheim. Or "That F***ing ***Hole."
We know you know who Jim Boeheim is. We know you probably dislike him. That's fair. It's part of his charm.
"Part of you wants the Spurs to win because they have such a great organization," he said. "They do it the right way. They did everything they could to win. But in the end, Danny Green proved why he's been in and out of the league all the time. (Green made an NBA Finals record 25 3-pointers, but was 2-for-19 in his final two games.)
Ah, Jim. Of course, part of the reaction is due in large part to the fact that Green is a former UNC star, the same UNC who is now a conference rival of the Orange. And so, just like with his infamous Denny's joke, we've noticed some of you have started assigning meaning to the things Jimmy B utters.
"He's trolling North Carolina!"
"He hates Roy Williams!"
"He's an entitled New York elitist!"
Believe us, we get it. We've seen it a hundred times before. Boeheim gets behind a microphone, possibly in a bad mood, someone asks a question and then magic is made. We've started getting a sixth sense about this stuff and can kind of sense when it's coming based on who's in the room and what the situation is. You'll get there, too.
Here's the thing. Jim Boeheim was not trolling North Carolina. I promise. I know this for a fact. And the reason I know this is because Jim Boeheim rarely trolls anyone specific.
He simply trolls. Because when you ask him a question, he tells you how he feels. Whether you really want to hear it or not.
The most famous example of that, of course, is the Bernie Fine defense. We can get into that whole kerfuffle another day but here's the one thing to know about why Jim Boeheim got up in front of a microphone and defended a potential pedophile while referring to potential victims as liars.
Because that's what he honestly believed. The "smart" thing to do would have been to stay quiet or speak diatribes like 99.9% of college coaches out there. But Jim Boeheim is not smart, at least not when it comes to playing the public perception game.
Now, we don't want to make it out like everything Jim Boeheim says is 100% truth. When it comes to talking about his SU basketball team, he's as shifty and crafty as they come. He'll downplay wins and oversell losses with the best of them. He'll spend all season telling you the team is fine and then, once the season is over, he'll admit it was moving chaos.
But if you ask him a question about something else, something unrelated to his current Syracuse basketball squad, he will tell you exactly what's on his mind. He might pepper in a joke or throw some shade for good measure, but, trust us, it's almost never because he's trying to piss you off. He just does it naturally.
(And seriously, the Denny's thing, this is the same guy who says "Diners, Drive-In's & Dives is my favorite show." and complains about fancy food while coaching the Olympic team. So, really, you're allowed to have fun with it.)
We say all this knowing full-well that many of you are going to get pissed off when he says something like, "Atlanta is just Syracuse in August." We know there's really nothing we can do to prevent it. We suspect it has to do with looks like this.
All we ask is that you understand Jim Boeheim isn't trolling you. He's trolling everyone.
Good to meet you guys, looking forward to seeing you at the Greensboro Denny's.
P.S. UNC sucks