Jimmy wants the title belt, you drunks.
Boys and girls: You officially have plans for the afternoon of July 28th.
No, seriously. You have plans. Oh, you thought you were going to a wedding that day? It's canceled on account of not being important. You thought you were taking your kid in for surgery or something silly like that? Again, it's canceled because children aren't important and this is your lesson for thinking otherwise. Seriously. You have something very important to do.
Dust off those ping pong balls and save the date for the Big East rival event of the year...Syracuse vs. Georgetown Beer Pong Tournament!
Join us for an afternoon of friendly competition, and sign-up to participate as one of the 32 teams (16 from each school) that will compete in the head-to-head tournament. The format will be single elimination, as well as a runner's bracket, so each team (of two) will play at least two games! Prizes will be awarded to the winning teams.
I demand a Syracuse victory this year. If the Orange lose, I'm sending you all out back for a switch and I'm going to teach you a lesson about winning, losing, and that losing meaning that your ass becomes redder than a Connecticut basketballer's mid-term examination.
The tournament is taking place at the Stumble Inn from 1-4 on July 28th. Team entrance fees are tiered based on Big Apple Orange membership. I'm expecting at least a few of you knuckleheads to enter as an official Troy Nunes is an Absolute Magician sanctioned team, so get on that. If you're not into throwing plastic balls and pretending to be some kind of athlete, you can do as many 12 ounce curls as possible for just $25. There's more information in that link up there, so go ahead and click it.
And remember: Winning isn't everything; it's the only thing that keeps me from murdering you with murdering things.