Who WAS Donovan Calling Last Weekend?

Operator, get me DOCTOR Gross.

Donnie, hey, it's me buddy. What's going on?

Daryl? How are you already on the line? I didn't even dial yet.

I'm a busy guy, Don. Have to stay connected. What can I do for you?

Well..are you watching the game?

Crap...is Syracuse playing today? Is it important? Should I be on camera? Is it televised? Where's my make-up kit?

What? No...the Eagles-Giants. I'm kicking ass.

Oh, great. Hey, if I swing by can you get me in Lurie's booth?

Um...the game's over in a couple minutes, so....no. I had a question though.

I've got a meeting with Marrone in five minutes and then I'm taking a schvitz with Coach Mac after that so make it quick.

I hear there's talk of bringing back #44.

Yeah...it's nonsense. 44 is so pre-me. I'm gonna keep it in the rafters so the attention stays where it should be...MY ENCHANTING FACE!

Oh...yeah, whatever, listen, I was thinking...I think #5 should be retired as well.

The Doctor is in, I'm listening...

Well, it was my number as you know and I'm pretty sure some other players have worn it at some point. I think that about settles it.

Hmmm....alright...I think..(BEEEEEEP)...oh excuse me, Donnybrook, got a call on the other line. (CLICK) Hello?

Daryl. Jim.

Jim who?

Jim "Imabouttoputabootinyoass" Brown.

Sorry, are you Native American?

It's Jim Brown!

JimmyJackCorn! What's shakin' buddy?

Shut up and listen.

Shutting up and listening, bubbe.

You on the phone with Donovan?

Sure am.

Put him on.

One sec (CLICK) Donnie, you there?

Yeah...kinda in a rush, so...

I've got Jim Brown on the line.

JIMMY!

Cut the bullshit, Donovan. #44 is the only number that gets retired. You want to retire #5 you get off your Chunky Soup guzzling ass and recruit some star quarterbacks to wear it too. Then, in thirty years, maybe we'll talk.

How did you even know we were having this conversation?

You think just cause a guy's old he doesn't have DirecTV? I've got DirecTV.   In HD.  It's God damn glorious.

Why are you dressed like that?

Like what?

Like an Egyptian?

How do you know I'm dressed like an Egyptian?

You are, aren't you?

........yes. The gold compliments my skin tones.

Babies, listen, gotta split. I'm media training Dougie to refer to it as DOCTOR Gross' Syracuse University. Gonna be a toughie. Donny Johnson, good luck next week. Jimmy Beans, it just came to me, I want you here for Egyptian Day when we play Rutgers next year, we'll honor you at halftime for...I don't know...wearing Egyptian clothes. Score another idea for the Grosser! Lates...