Who WAS Donovan Calling Last Weekend?
Operator, get me DOCTOR Gross.
Donnie, hey, it's me buddy. What's going on?
Daryl? How are you already on the line? I didn't even dial yet.
I'm a busy guy, Don. Have to stay connected. What can I do for you?
Well..are you watching the game?
Crap...is Syracuse playing today? Is it important? Should I be on camera? Is it televised? Where's my make-up kit?
What? No...the Eagles-Giants. I'm kicking ass.
Oh, great. Hey, if I swing by can you get me in Lurie's booth?
Um...the game's over in a couple minutes, so....no. I had a question though.
I've got a meeting with Marrone in five minutes and then I'm taking a schvitz with Coach Mac after that so make it quick.
I hear there's talk of bringing back #44.
Yeah...it's nonsense. 44 is so pre-me. I'm gonna keep it in the rafters so the attention stays where it should be...MY ENCHANTING FACE!

Oh...yeah, whatever, listen, I was thinking...I think #5 should be retired as well.
The Doctor is in, I'm listening...
Well, it was my number as you know and I'm pretty sure some other players have worn it at some point. I think that about settles it.
Hmmm....alright...I think..(BEEEEEEP)...oh excuse me, Donnybrook, got a call on the other line. (CLICK) Hello?
Jim "Imabouttoputabootinyoass" Brown.
Sorry, are you Native American?
JimmyJackCorn! What's shakin' buddy?
Shutting up and listening, bubbe.
You on the phone with Donovan?
One sec (CLICK) Donnie, you there?
I've got Jim Brown on the line.
Cut the bullshit, Donovan. #44 is the only number that gets retired. You want to retire #5 you get off your Chunky Soup guzzling ass and recruit some star quarterbacks to wear it too. Then, in thirty years, maybe we'll talk.
How did you even know we were having this conversation?
You think just cause a guy's old he doesn't have DirecTV? I've got DirecTV. In HD. It's God damn glorious.
Why are you dressed like that?
How do you know I'm dressed like an Egyptian?
........yes. The gold compliments my skin tones.
Babies, listen, gotta split. I'm media training Dougie to refer to it as DOCTOR Gross' Syracuse University. Gonna be a toughie. Donny Johnson, good luck next week. Jimmy Beans, it just came to me, I want you here for Egyptian Day when we play Rutgers next year, we'll honor you at halftime for...I don't know...wearing Egyptian clothes. Score another idea for the Grosser! Lates...
Comments
That is a good look for Jim Brown. Can’t wait for Egyptian Day!
Go, fight, and win.
by Alex O on
Jan 14, 2009 3:36 PM EST
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McNabb
Let’s see him pony up some more money……Melo was here for 1 year and has given 3 times as much.
by Dirty U on
Jan 14, 2009 4:10 PM EST
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Oh. My. God.
Brilliant.
ALMOST as brilliant as THIS.
by Cody K on
Jan 14, 2009 4:43 PM EST
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This is why the DOCTOR is always on two phones!
I want to get to know the DOCTOR so he can give me a fun nickname.
by voteprime on
Jan 14, 2009 5:06 PM EST
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Shut up and listen
is my favorite line, because he probably says that a lot and frankly, Jim Brown scares me. He’s 72 years old and could probably beat the hell out of most of us.
by Otis Hill on
Jan 14, 2009 5:15 PM EST
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A confession
When Judge Joe Brown first came on TV I heard the name and got him confused with Jim Brown. And I thought, “When the hell did Jim Brown become a judge?” quickly followed by, “Jesus, that’s, like 50 bazillion times scarier than Judge Judy or Judge Wapner.”
by voteprime on
Jan 14, 2009 5:32 PM EST
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amazing
I just spit coffee through my nose. Kinda like Jimmy B did in the locker room
at halftime last night. According to my sources.
by Brower'sBoy on
Jan 15, 2009 9:07 AM EST
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