A secret society of the eight wealthiest mascots in the Northeast convenes at an estate in
They control the Northeastern bank money supplies,
This is a pretty big day for you.
Fuck yeah! And you can’t take it away from me so don’t even try.
What? Sorry, didn’t hear you, too busy staring at my Big East conference championship ring.
(Mountaineer holds up left hand, showing off ring)
They don’t make a Big East conference championship ring.
Okay fine, you got me.
So what ring is that?
You really are wearing a ring. What’s it for?
I won the Morgantown Cornhole Tournament last year, you happy?
Depends on the kind of cornhole you’re talking about, honey.
Look, we’re here for a reason. Another season is over and I thought everyone could get up here and talk about how it went for them. I’ll start…well, I’m back where I belong. Conference champ. Going to a BCS bowl. Of course, I would have liked to have played for a national title since it’s been a while, so-
Okay, thanks for that, but I’d like to-
And you’ve played more games than any other program in the country without winning a national title.
Hey, you had your shot, Mr. Second-Ranked-In-The-Nation-And-Couldn’t-Get-It-Done.
SHUT UP! Fine, Bearcat, pull yourself away from licking Brian Kelly's toes for a second. Congrats on your first season in the Big East.
Just be happy he even knows your in the conference.
That’s not an actual bowl..
Are the Fire still playing? Maybe I can go see a two-fer.
You mean the World League football team? The team from the league that stopped playing in the
Who the fuck cares.org?
Sweeties, please…no fighting.
Listen to twinkle-toes over here.
I think he’s saying you got served.
Cardinal, you’re pretty quiet over there, how bout you?
What? Oh, I’m with the Knight. Nothing happened this year.
Oh my poor Brian…my sweet sweet Brian...
Otto, I don’t even want to hear it.
Well I just wanted to talk about one thing-
(Everyone huddles around computer screen)
(Bearcat vomits on self)
I had no idea you were into that…call me sometime.