There's No Pleasing The Good Doctor

I found this a little humorous, although I'm sure the swimming and diving folks wouldn't agree quite as much. Two members of the men's and women's swimming and diving teams made a presentation at Monday's Student Association meeting that outlined the swimmers' plans to keep the programs alive.

As we all know, DOCTOR Daryl Gross and the
athletic department announced in June that SU would be ending the swimming and diving programs after this season for budgetary reasons. First and foremost among those concerns was the need to build a new natatorium.

I think I speak for everyone when I ask...
what the hell is a natatorium? (It's a free-standing building that contains a swimming pool, as you might have guessed by now)

Among the recommendations from Gollands and Ellis were to build a less expensive natatorium than the $30 million the university says a new pool will cost. They also suggested renting the facility at nearby Nottingham High School.

Henry Wildhack, senior associate director of athletics for Syracuse and once described by Gross as "the salt of the Syracuse community," addressed the issues from that meeting, the salty dog that he is. And here's where it gets kinda funny in that way that only SU can do...

Wildhack said neither of those would be viable options. As for renting the facility at Nottingham, he said that could present scheduling conflicts, insurance and liability concerns and problems with the NCAA. He said the new facility that Director of Athletics Daryl Gross wants would cost $30 million.

It's a savvy move. Cause you see, its not DOCTOR Daryl Gross that's the bad guy, its that other guy, Director of Athletics Daryl Gross. DOCTOR Daryl Gross wants to save swimming and diving but Director of Athletics Daryl Gross has made outrageous demands, like the need for a $30 million dollar facility even though
its very possible to create one for half that. DOCTOR Daryl Gross wants the issue resolved, Director of Athletics Daryl Gross says his decision is final. DOCTOR Daryl Gross is reasonable and wants to make everyone happy while Director of Athletics Daryl Gross is a monster hellbent on chaos and eating babies.

Surely, the old "I just have to throw my hands up cause there's nothing I can do to meet the demands of myself" approach works time and time again. Plus I'm pretty sure Boss Hogg tried something similar on an episode of Dukes of Hazzard once.




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