Three figures in black masks are led into a dark room. They’re thrown down onto steel chairs and told to sit quietly. They are tied up.
Quickly, the masks are pulled from their heads, revealing three disheveled, sweaty mascots.
What the hell’s going on?
What treachery is this?
Boo for everything!
Shit...I've seen this movie. Now one of us is gonna be forced to eat the other one's intestines in order to survive or some shit. I'm eatin' Orange over there...least he'll be juicy.
Unhand me, you fools. So that I may brain thee! Reveal yourselves!
From the shadows emerge some familiar faces…
Scarlet, cut the shit.
Looks like someone’s been bad wittle boys.
I think you all know why you’re here.
Chocolate sundaes and sprinkles!!!
What’s this shit all about the Big Ten?
Bull, please. Language.
Fuck off, twinkle tail.
I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Tis nothing but conjecture!
That’s what Eagle said right before he flew the coup.
Eagle…flew the coup?
Otto, have you spoken with anyone from the Big Ten lately?
The Cincinnati Bearcat rushes in.
What the hell, guys? Why didn’t you tell me you were doing this?
You didn’t get Mountaineer’s message?
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
‘Neer, he’s the Bearcat.
Which is now in the Big East.
‘Neer, why don’t you go wait outside.
No, I’m fine.
Did you see that couch in perfectly good condition on the way in?
I think maybe it needs a little burning, what do you think?
ALRIGHT! I’ll be out back getting my burn on!
The Mountaineer leaves.
The three prisoners are untied.
Just keep your noses clean.
Coming from the representative of the team with the most arrested players in the Big East, that means a lot.
I’ll kill you, I swear to God. I’ll strangle you to death with your own tail.
Please don’t hate us, guys. We love you and don’t want to see you go.
Everyone leaves, except for Otto, who pulls out his cellphone and dials.
None of the others are onto the plan.
So why didn’t you just say that?
We never agreed to any code.
I’m seriously starting to reconsider this…